kink curious? explore 10 different kinks for beginners + pros
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time to read 4 min
Published Oct 12, 2022
Updated Oct 3, 2026
got some kink in you? get kinky with expert tips
Kink doesn’t have to be intimidating... in fact, it literally refers to anything that's taboo, so depending on your definition, it could be literally anything. If you’re not sure whether it’s for you, it’s easy to dip your toes in without jumping into the deep end… then wade in further if you so desire. Here are a few kinks to explore if you’re interested in adding something new to your sex life, ranging from the mildest to the spiciest. And if you're already at the ultra-spicy level, might we suggest combining 1, 2, 3, or more kinks to create your own menu of options? Of course we believe it's all best paired with kinky lingerie that comes with built-in play and luxurious discovery.
Kink 1: Voyeurism
sexual gratification through the act of watching
beginner kink:
watch porn or social sex with a lover
intermediate kink:
ask a partner to film themselves for you
advanced kink:
attend a sex party and observe all the X-rated play in person
Kink 2: Technosexuality
sexual activity involving technology
beginner kink:
use a vibrator on yourself — or have a partner use one on you — during sex
intermediate kink:
have a partner use an app-controlled vibrator on you from a distance
advanced kink:
invest in a sex machine that will do the dirty work for you
Kink 3: Temperature play
playing with hot and cold sensations
beginner kink:
run ice cubes over each other’s bodies
intermediate kink:
warm or heat up sex toys by placing them in water of your desired temperature (some are also freezable or microwavable)
advanced kink:
bring a massage candle into the bedroom and rub each other (or yourself) with the melted wax
Kink 4: Exhibitionism
sexual gratification through being watched
beginner kink:
surprise your partner by greeting them in your sexiest, naughtiest piece of lingerie
intermediate kink:
send a lover a photo of you touching yourself, stripping or posing seductively
advanced kink:
show everything off on a nude beach or clothing-optional resort
Pro tip:
tease them all night in ouvert lingerie or sheer lingerie
Take your exhibitionism on the road with play pieces you wear all night from dinner to the after party... for tease every time they take you in. Think bras with open cups layered over tees, backless boxers under sheer skirts, bustiers or corset tops made with peekaboo lace that leaves almost nothing (and everything) to their imagination. It's all about strategic layering and using your sultriest lingerie as outerwear. If you've got luxury lingerie with built-in kink, like a bustier with zip-off cups, you dress with a little suggestion and let the exhibitionism play out later when you turn the bustier into a corset while they watch. Next time you wear, the anticipation will put you in the power seat.
double entendre bustier with zip-off cups for slow reveral
Kink 5: Restraint
tying/being tied up
beginner kink:
tie each other to the bedpost with a sash or tie (bonus if it slips off your panties)
intermediate kink:
play with a pair of handcuffs (just make sure you don’t lose the key!)
advanced kink:
get a shibari rope and a guidebook or join an class to learn how to make fancy knots
Kink 6: Impact
using force to create sensations
beginner kink:
spank your partner or get spanked, starting with the lightest touch and working upward
intermediate kink:
get a flogger and drag it across each other’s skin, using more force if desired
advanced kink:
use a spanking paddle, being very careful to start slowly
Kink 7: Domination and submission
playing with power and control
beginner kink:
have one partner order the other around (“get on your back,” “spread your legs,” etc.)
intermediate kink:
play with orgasm denial (“you can’t cum until I say you can”)
advanced kink:
role-play a scene involving power dynamics, like teacher/student or boss/employee
Kink 8: Group sex
sex with more than two people
beginner kink:
watch a cam show with a partner and see how you like having someone else virtually present
intermediate kink:
invite another sexy human to watch you two have sex
advanced kink:
have the other person join in if the chemistry is right
Pro tip:
talking dirty can start with what you're wearing
Not sure what to say or how to say it? Start with describing what you're wearing in detail, and how their gaze or touch is making your feel, what you'd like them to do, how you like them to undress you. Or, let them describe how what they see, how the silk feels, what they'd like to do. If you've got kinky lingerie, like the Champagne 33 bodysuit, use the removable ties as restraints and describe how you're going to take it off and tie them up or tie them down.
champagne 33 bodysuit with removable ties for play
Kink 9: Dirty talk
speaking to each other in ways that are arousing
beginner kink:
tell each other what words and phrases get you going, and pull them out in the bedroom (here’s a list of questions).
intermediate kink:
sext each other throughout the day to build anticipation
advanced kink:
write erotic stories and whisper them into each other’s ears
Kink 10: Praise kink
getting off on being praised
beginner kink:
moan, groan and tell each other when something feels good (which you should probably be doing anyway)
intermediate kink:
stand in front of a mirror with your partner behind you and have them point out everything they love about your body
advanced kink:
have your partner show you off to a friend or other third party and tell them what a good girl you are
How do you take your favorite kinks up or down a notch?
dial up the kink with lingerie that's up for anything
